IF!

the word if itself says it all. if an alias for hindi word 'kaash' gives rise to surrealism and hope.hope is man's best friend and also the worst enemy which creeps when least expected to stab you.
yesterday i was just thinking the importance of this word in my life and as i went down the memory lane it just made it presence felt somehow. i can't say i am not immune to this feeling but it has come to my rescue on helluva occations
when i am feeling low 'IF' increases my morale givin' hope to the damned.
sometimes rather i say most of the times 'IF'
gives us just false hope......................
a premonitions of disaster's..................... AS LIFE FUCKS
a picturesque of my dreams............................ THE DREAM CATCHER
an anticlimax to fantasies..................................... THE FANTASY BUSTER
the more meaningful


SOMETIMES CIRCUMSTANCES AND MY REACTIONS FORCE ME TO THINK that whether i am a big psycho kya?
why do i like to spend time alone? am i a loner?
why am i just so moody?
why do people bore me generally after talking with them for sometimebut it isn't like i start hating them its like i just loose interest in them they cease to exist for me...
GHOSH!! THESE PEOPLE ARE SO IGNORANT THEY DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT THEY WANT FROM THIER LIVES. DO I?
but then here the tragedy starts
THE more meaningful people i meet half the time the friendship which i so badly want doesn't emulate and when it does then its for life .
the story of my life can be summed up as a soccer game
allow me to elaborate
i am a midfielder i create chances for others the strikers . they r the ones who benefit most from me.
when i try to be a striker i fail miserably i am too horibile
ONLY IF I COULD SUCEED ONCE JUST THIS ONE TIME WHICH MATTERS THE MOST
IF IF IF
IF IF
IF
enough shit
okay fine
her name is..............
keep speculating